THE EVOLUTION OF SEXY: Part III – Timeless Beauty and Why I Love Grace….

In my opinion, she is the most beautiful woman that ever existed. She was the personification of her very own name since she carried herself with grace like no other. She was soft spoken, delicate and charming. She was as beautiful as a princess….and eventually earned that title. She was…..

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Grace Kelly

…the eternal Grace Kelly.
Not only was she a natural beauty, she was an inspirational fashionista. She could get away with any look and OWN it. Any time I watch any of her movies, I find myself so captivated by her that I end up losing the storyline! The way she walked; like a ballerina, the way she talked; perfect diction, her mannerisms were so delicate. She just embodied her name.
But there’s one more thing I love about Grace; her look has always been timeless. She embraced her age and knew when it was time for her look to evolve while always remaining beautiful. Here are some examples….enjoy!

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Here she was very young, flaunting her slender figure. A model of class. She’s not in a trashy or suggestive pose and she still looks sexy and beautiful.

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Still young here, she’s wearing a strapless dress with an amazing necklace. Though the necklace is stunning, you still can’t take your eyes off her. She’s wearing the necklace, the necklace isn’t wearing her. Once again, no provocative poses here, she looks relaxed and ladylike.

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Here is Her Serene Highness looking amazing in her royal garb. Very refined.

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Grace Kelly a bit older…still off the shoulder gown but with a higher neckline. Notice how she looks classy, elegant, respectable AND sexy/beautiful. Love the earrings!

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A bit older Grace again with an off the shoulder gown with an even higher neckline smiling confidently. No age crisis here! Beautiful! She does NOT look sl*tty, she looks amazing.

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Judging by the date on the magazine, she was 50 years old. Still looking lovely and sophisticated. She doesn’t look like she’s needy for attention or like she’s trying to prove a point by trying to look young and ridiculous (see part II of this series). She looks like she has embraced her age and took it as an opportunity to discover new ways of looking beautiful.

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Here is one of her last pictures. She’s wearing an elegant age-appropriate dress with long strand pearls adorning her. She still looks fabulous. She is the epitome of timeless beauty. Looking through these pictures, the thought “my goodness she aged” never crosses your mind! All you think is “wow she’s older here and still looks amazing!”
Did she dress like she was twenty when she was fifty? Nope. Did she put on the same amount of makeup in her fifties as she did in her twenties? Negative. She embraced her age and adjusted her look accordingly. Did she give up and look like she rolled off the bed? No! She still did her hair, matched her ensembles with jewelry and accessories. Grace Kelly set the tone for timeless beauty. You don’t have to have her face and figure to copy her sterling example. All you have to do is REMEMBER YOUR AGE AND EMBRACE IT, and you too will achieve timeless and effortless beauty and your “sexy” look will evolve and reach higher plains.

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Thanks for setting such a fine example of class, beauty, modesty, sexiness and grace, Grace. 🙂

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When You Love A Cat

*If you are not animal friendly or cat friendly, please exit this page.*

“Have you ever loved somebody so much 
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad 
You can’t sleep at night 
Have you ever tried to find the words 
But they don’t come out right 
Have you ever, have you ever” – (Have You Ever performed by Brandy)

Humans- as good as some of us may be, are imperfect. We all have bad tendencies. Some humans are malicious, bitter and vicious. Some gossip and ruin others’ reputations. Some betray those who are close to them. Many “love” with conditions or ulterior motives. There are very few genuinely good people out there and if you find one, it’s like finding a diamond.
I have never known of an animal that has loved with condition. If anything, they ask for a nice home, a comfotable spot to sleep in, regular meals and love from their owners. In return, the owner receives unshakable devotion, love and loyalty. Though each species has different ways of showing love and affection, (dogs and cats) they still show it.

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I have been chosen to be honored and privileged with the unconditional love of a cat called Snappy. She is very affectionate. As soon as I come home from work, she happily chirrups and looks at me attentively with her big green curious eyes. She is unquestionably obedient. The way she loves is like no other cat I’ve ever known. The way she curls up with me, the blissful look on her face when I pet her, the way her eyes light up when I talk to her. I have never experienced an attachment this deep with a pet until Snappy came along.

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So imagine my shock when she was diagnosed with FeLV (feline leukemia virus) last week during a routine vet visit. I was and still am destoyed. I noticed she has been congested and breathing strangely. I also discovered a lump in her throat. I thought it was an inflamed gland or a tumor that could be removed. However after bloodwork, the vet told me otherwise. He even offered to put her down. But I couldn’t….I just couldn’t.

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Snappy at the vet. She was sooo good.

Other than the congested breathing and the swollen lymph nodes, she is a very happy and normally functioning cat. She sleeps, plays, uses the litter box, eats and shows love like any other 2 year old kitty.
To protect the other cats in our house, we put her in my room where she can enjoy her time. I am providing everything I can to ease her and please her. She seems very happy with the attention and has adjusted nicely to the change of atmosphere. Until I see serious “signs” of her health deteriorating and her quality of life waning, I will keep her safe in my room. And no matter what happens or when it happens, I will keep her safe in my heart.

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slumber party with Snappy

She is the best cat I’ve ever had. She is my joy. I can’t imagine being without her or saying goodbye to her; I tear up just thinking about it. However, I read that she only has months to live, if she’s well taken care of and everything is just so, up to two years. I can’t even think of it. I know with some time, it will sink in and I will have to come to terms with the gravity of her illness. I’m trying to not think about the death sentence she received but to cherish, relish, appreciate and celebrate every moment of her dear life.

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Regardless of unwanted opinions from people, I’m making as many special memories with my beloved little girl as possible. Every moment we’re together, it’s like my mind takes a picture of the moments to store in my heart and mind forever. Trust me, I will treasure them always.

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my lil princess

THE EVOLUTION OF SEXY: Ridiculous Beauty- Part II: The Sleazy, The Trashy and The Ugly; And Why I Love Helen Mirren

In my last THE EVOLUTION OF SEXY post I discussed how modest dress and discreet behavior can be beautiful and sexy.  The importance of mystery and leaving things to the imagination was emphasized.  What happens when women do not apply this and follow the examples of Hollywood celebrities?  What happens when visibly aging women try to dress young and flaunt their “preserved” figures?  What happens when women let it all hang out (literally) and gravity is not on their side?  What happens when too much makeup is applied?  How much is too much?  How old is too old? 

The answer lies in one word: balance.  Is it wrong to age?  No!  It’s natural!  Is it wrong for older women to look stunning?  Absolutely not!  However it matters how she makes herself stunning.  Is a 20 year old a 20 year old forever?  No, so don’t try to be 20 when you’re in your forties, fifties, sixties and seventies.  What would you do if your grandmother teased and dyed her hair red, applied way too much makeup, had nails from here to California, wore tight dresses, high heels and carried herself like an offering for men?  What if she got surgery done and most of her body was fake?  Would you feel proud of her?  Would you think she looks amazing?  Would you want to crawl under a rock and hope no one realizes you’re related? 

Take Sophia Loren:

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She is obviously young here.  She is wearing very heavy eye makeup.  Her eye lashes look extremely long and lovely.  Her eyebrows are meticulously done.  Her hair is for the most part slick back.  She looks great in this picture. 

But now:

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The makeup is excessive and she looks like a clown.  It does not look like she is embracing her age.  It looks like she refuses to accept it.  I mean, don’t you think she could have chosen a wig that is a more natural color considering she’s in her seventies in this picture?  Oh yes, I love how the caked on eye shadow gets lumped up between the folds of her eye wrinkles and I would just die for those praying mantis lashes!  She’s trying too hard.

Not enough for you?  Scroll down…

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I got this picture from an article where she was praised for looking fabulous in her seventies.  Really?  So it’s fabulous to have your chest parts peeking out of your dress at age 70?  So she has a nice figure…don’t most people in Hollywood?  There’s nothing special about that. It’s easy to keep your figure when you can $ afford $ to.  (You know exactly what I’m talking about.)  This picture is kind of an oxymoron- tight dress and a young body with granny glasses and a wig. (Maybe they’re not granny glasses, but she sure makes them look like granny glasses)  She’s trying waayyyyy too hard.  Even the look on her face seems like she’s needy for attention.  Ridiculous and disastrous. 

I am not saying grandmothers belong on rocking chairs knitting, they can look wonderful too.  This is where evolution of sexy comes in.  The word “sexy” evolves into “elegance,” “timeless” and “ageless beauty.”  My next segment in this series will discuss someone who in my opinion is the epitome of ageless beauty.  In the meantime, here is another example of elegant-sexy for women of mature years. 

Dame Helen Mirren:

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Notice how the makeup is not excessive.  Her hair is natural, perhaps somewhat enhanced color but it is subtle.  She dresses herself up with elegant jewelry.  Effortless and timeless.

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HM is ravishing in this dress.  She has no “parts” hanging out and the dress is not tight, just fitted.  Does the dress hide her gorgeous curves?  By no means!  Does she look like she’s trying too hard?  Absolutely not, she’s all ease and glamour.  Nothing trashy here.

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Notice how she embraces the white hair…and how fabulous it looks on her!  No over-dying, no colored wigs, no point to prove.  She knows that grey/white hair is beautiful.  She’s showing some cleavage here, but that’s all.  Nothing is dangling out of her dress.  She is applying the “less is more” principle.  She looks amazing. 

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Well done, Helen.  That’s how you embrace age- with dignity, poise, pride, elegance and grace.  Speaking of “grace,” stay tuned for my next and possibly last segment of The Evolution of Sexy.

THE EVOLUTION OF SEXY: Effortless Beauty – Part I: Why I love Ingrid Bergman

Some women just have it.  Some women have to make an effort.  What am I talking about?  Sex appeal- the long voluminous hair, fitted pants hugging voluptuous curves, high heels giving the female body height and grace.  Then there are the more intricate strategies such as eye makeup contouring the eyes making them look sensual, possibly even false eye lashes to accomplish the look.  Then there’s the red pouty lips achieved by red lipstick or even by surgical means.  Then some women go even further by staring at themselves in the mirror and studying their facial expressions, body motions and demeanor.  They alter the way they walk, switching their hips side to side mimicking a pendulum.  They will blink their eyes in a certain way to accentuate their faux lashes or heavily applied eye shadow.  They will maintain a hypnotic look in their eyes in an attempt to mesmerize any man that looks into them.  They will turn their heads in a way that makes their hair bounce; they will pucker up their lips while they talk, smile, yawn, or cry.  These are women, who whether they genuinely look as good as they think or not, live their lives in a constant pose.  They are “camera ready” and never live a relaxed moment.  They live life not breathing due to holding in their midsection.  They happily endure back pain forcing their posture to exaggerate their bodily assets.  The goal of these women is to ooze sensuality.  Whether they reach their goal or not…is a different story. 

However, should there be limits?

Sadly, the generation in which we live now synonymizes beauty and sexiness with nudity.  Is it truly necessary to be naked or half naked to be beautiful and sexy?  Is their a time frame for certain styles to evolve into different styles?  This series of posts will use famous people as examples of how timeless their iconic beauty can be OR how ridiculous and trashy they can become.  I know some people may get mad at what I write since I may use their favorite actresses as bad examples, but remember Freedom of Speech, and this is my opinion.  If you disagree, that’s what the X button at the top right hand side of the screen is for.  Do not bother commenting.  It will be deleted.  Now to begin.

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Here is Ingrid Bergman looking beautiful in the movie Notorious.  Is she strutting around half naked?  No.  Actually she is very modestly dressed, with a jacket and a hat.  Does she have a lascivious or inviting look on her face?  No, she looks quite serious, almost worried and nervous.  So how is it that she manages to look amazing in this shot?  Is it the way her eyes are positioned?  Is it the dark lipstick?  All are possibilities.  The point is she’s working with what she has- Full lips (that are not force puckered out), smooth skin, and the mystery behind the hat.  Did you notice my choice of words?   Mystery!  She is leaving everything to the imagination which is something that nudity, tight fitting clothes and lustful facial expressions do not accomplish.  Yet that’s all around us nowadays. 

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Here is Ingrid Bergman again in the movie Notorious.  If you can tear your eyes away from the dazzling earrings she’s wearing, notice that (if you saw the movie, you’d know) she is fully clothed in a modest dress in this scene, her eye brows are natural and her hair is pinned back.  No deliberate hair bouncing here!  Does she have a hypnotic stare?  Not really, she’s just having a conversation.  Her eyes don’t look inviting, she looks concerned actually.  Yet you can’t help being captivated by her natural beauty…and those earrings!!!  Still don’t believe me?  Continue reading…

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Here is Ingrid Bergman in the movie Spellbound.  Her character is a psychiatrist who is treating a man who is mentally ill.  No time for sexiness here!  Her hair is pinned back, her eye brows are natural, and she has a pale natural lipstick on.  As if that wasn’t enough to suppress beauty, she is wearing unflattering glasses and a lab coat!  She fits the part as a dedicated doctor who is everything BUT vain about her appearance.  So how does she manage to look spectacular in this picture?  BECAUSE SHE IS NOT TRYING!!  Seriously, she’s not trying to be sexy.  Had she put more makeup on, let her hair down, altered the waist line of her lab coat, and sat in a seductive pose playing with her glasses, she would have been trying.  Kind of like Ana de la Reguera in Nacho Libre:

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Since when are their dresses fitted like that around the waist?

See what I mean?  Trying too hard.  Pathetic.

Ladies, be real, accept your flaws and work with what you have.  Don’t try so hard.  Looking like a prostitute will get you treated like a prostitute.  Don’t demean yourselves.  There’s nothing wrong with makeup and styling your hair and wearing nice clothes and having a nice body, but when you obsess over getting attention from the opposite sex and competing with other women, it’s not healthy.  Be beautiful and be yourselves, like Ingrid Bergman.  Stay tuned for Part II of The Evolution of Sexy. 

Special Post: Happily Divorced…Yes It Can Be a GOOD Thing! Happy 6 Months!!

 

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After death, divorce is probably one of the most exhausting, difficult and emotionally devastating situations.  It is the “death” of a marriage and it can be mourned.  However, depending on the situation, divorce can also be one of the most liberating actions a person can take.  It’s like the saying goes:

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LOL!!!  Am I right?  Once again…this is depending on the situation.  I view marriage as sacred.  It is God’s arrangement and as such should be respected and treasured.  But when you find receipts for negligees that are not yours and outgoing calls to strip clubs on your phone bill, etc etc etc etc etc…something is obviously wrong and you need to…

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…TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!  (Don’t you just love that picture?!)  Mind you, I didn’t always joke around about divorce the way I do now.  I was deeply depressed when my marriage crumbled and I was so affected that I made some mistakes of my own that I’m not proud of.  I was at rock bottom.  It was time to put on my big girl panties and take responsibility for my life.  In fact, it took me two long years to finally finish the process since I wasn’t getting help from anyone, nor did I want help…least of all from the ex creature I was ridding myself of.  I wanted to do it myself…for ME.  Another important factor was timing.  I didn’t want to be crying or furious in the court room.  I wanted to be cool, composed and HAPPY!  I allowed myself to be a pathetic sight for as long as it took….and trust me, I was a pathetic sight!  (keyword: WAS)  I cried, I bled, I yelled and suffered migraines over this divorce, but that was only the “healing process” and I was NOT going to be in that state in the court room!

At the end of last year (2011) a force just gave me the strength and stamina to make calls, argue on the phone, and contact certain unwanted people…all with the prize in view- having my last name back and being free.  Now, 6 months after the judge called me “Miss” and gave me a paper with a beautiful gold seal finalizing my divorce, I am happier than ever!

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WOOHOO!!!  LOL.  A huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.  I feel empowered and liberated.  When people ask me questions, I know that I have the option not to answer.  I live how I want to live, spend my money how I want to spend it and I no longer suppress my personality in the hopes of pleasing a man who, no matter what, is not going to love me because it just wasn’t meant to be. 

I live a peaceful life. People are always telling me they want me to party, have more fun and enjoy life.  To me, that’s not enjoying life.  Being self sufficient and empowered is enjoying life, not getting drunk, making a fool out of myself dancing perverted dances with useless and depraved men at a club and not remembering what happened.  Maybe my idea of fun isn’t the same as yours.  Friends and acquaintances say “you need to find someone to complete you.”  I am complete now that I’ve gotten rid of the leach that was sucking away at my identity.  In my case, a divorce is something I celebrate! 

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How come nobody got me a cake like this?!  LOL!!!  People say they don’t want me to be alone and are quick to refer me to “eligible” bachelors.  Alone?  I have been alone before- when I was married, I was alone all the time.  Doesn’t it hurt more to have someone and still be alone than to be alone and empowered by choice?  Is a man so necessary for happiness?  Not in my case.  This doesn’t mean I’m not open to a relationship should a GOOD man come along, I’m just not actively seeking a relationship and have no intention to do so any time soon. 

A month after my happy divorce I made myself a divorce ring.  Hey, if a wedding brings on a ring, so can a divorce!  LOL  It’s black (death of marriage), and I wear it on my left ring finger…I recently moved it to my right hand, if I feel like wearing it at all. 

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The point is, as imperfect human beings we cannot see the big picture in life.  We make stupid choices, we fail, we fall over and over again.  It doesn’t mean we’re stupid, it just means we’re human.  It doesn’t mean that we have to go to pieces because we think our lives have temporarily gone to pieces.   When something big and scary like divorce happens to you, feel the pain, yes, allow yourself that!  There will come a time where you will get sick of crying, sick of seeing his last name on your mail, sick of being bound to a nuisance and you will empower youself and take a stand.  Beauty and new appreciation for life can come out of the worst situations.  Gold is beautiful because it is exposed to the hottest of firey temperatures with the goal of being refined.  So let these experiences in life refine you and make you a more beautiful person.  Look forward to the outcome – a new lesson learned, freedom, dignity, happiness. 

Congratulations on finding yourself.  

Button Stud Earrings!!!

Hello crafty bloggers and hello non-crafty bloggers!  I made an adorable pair of stud earrings the other day and I’d love to share with you how I made them so you can make your own! You’ll be laughing when you see how ridiculously simple it is!

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Supplies:
Pretty buttons of your choice
Glue
Earring backs – available at any craft store
Pliers – flat chain nosed or flush cutters, whichever takes your fancy.

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Begin by removing the loop from the button (the part that the thread goes through) with your choice of pliers.  Try to get the back surface as flat as you can.

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Next, glue the earring back onto the back surface of the button.  Then let the new earrings sit for a few hours. I usually let them sit overnight. A helpful tip: if the button is faceted or circular, it will obviously wobble when it stands, then the glue will shift to one side and dry that way thus causing an embarrassment when it falls off in public lol.  To avoid this disaster, prop up the earrings somewhere so that they are straight, then the glue will dry and adhere evenly.

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Once dry, try gently pulling at the earrings to make sure they adhered properly. If they’re truly dry, sweep your hair back and show off your delicate and stylish studs!

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Enjoy!!!